Tuesday, December 29, 2020

A Look Back at 2020


I don't think I can be terribly original in describing 2020. No doubt others have written far more eloquently than I have about this Annus Horibilis, so I will leave it to them. But I will at least write of my own experience. Partly for posterity for my poor descendents (if they ever have the morbid curiosity to read this thing) ... but also because this has become a tradition of this blog ever since starting it.

So here goes - my review of 2020.

Obviously, the year has been dominated by the Coronavirus. When lockdown was announced in March it felt so surreal, like a movie. Of course, movies about global disasters might be fun to watch – but it's not so fun when you're actually in one.

Keeping the boys occupied during lockdown was easy in some respects - they spent most of their time on screens, much to my regret. The novelty of doing remote learning wore off pretty quick and it was a constant struggle to manage, but eventually we relaxed things a bit. There was no point fighting those battles. Sure, they missed about six months of their education but I don't think they'll suffer greatly because of it. I'm just disappointed that they are so dependent on their screen time.

What struck me about the lockdown was that I actually quite enjoyed it, to some extent. As an introvert with a virtual masters degree in being socially awkward, the idea of not having to go out and actually interact with fellow human beings felt like a huge relief. It was a bit like taking a holiday from everyday social interactions, which was very welcome. Of course, these feelings were somewhat hampered by the ascension of everyone's favourite online meeting tool. Yes, you guessed it - Zoom.

Whilst I appreciated Zoom for all of its wondrous technical capability of bringing people together from far flung places, when using it for any kind of social purpose it became truly excruciating. You miss a lot of the behavioural clues I guess, and when you're not particularly confident in the first place it just amplifies your anxiety. I do hope, however, to continue using Zoom (other platforms are available, of course) for meeting purposes long after the pandemic has subsided, mainly because it negates the need to faff around with all that travel/parking/finding the place rigmarole. Plus I've found it helps the meetings to go quicker, because there's less of the usual tedious pre- and post-amble that tends to happen – and I also think it keeps the talkers in check a bit better.

I really am a barrel of laughs me.

Work went pretty much dead at the start of lockdown, thanks to loads of events I was booked to work on being cancelled, but soon the work picked up a bit (most of which I could do from home) and I also ended up taking on the role of producer for our weekly church service videos which kept me occupied. This is still on-going – we're not sure when we'll actually be meeting up in the church building again like we used to. Probably not until well into 2021.

Having started fostering in November, we had already gotten into the swing of things by the time the new year came around. When lockdown hit we had a bit of a wobble admittedly, but our foster child was fairly oblivious to it all thankfully. The process of moving them on for adoption took longer than it would have, thanks to Covid, but eventually they transitioned to their adoptive parents almost a year since coming to live with us. It was a bittersweet moment - saying goodbye to someone who had become embedded in our lives for a year, but knowing that a loving couple were going to look after them forever and give them a really good start in life. One upside was that it was nice to have a bit of a break from looking after a little person (who was good as gold but still quite demanding).

Once that was over, Wifey went in for an operation on her thyroid gland. It all went smoothly and, after a couple of weeks recourperating, she's well on the way to full strength. I'm struck how the timing of all of this couldn't have been better. Wifey was in real need of the op, but had she gone to hospital while we were still fostering it would have been a real strain. Yes, we would have coped - but the good timing made things so much easier to deal with. Also, interestingly, because of Covid I think she actually had a better standard of care than if she had gone for the op pre-lockdown. This is because basically there had to be less people in the wards and so the ratio of staff to patients was much better. I'm not saying the health system has been magically improved by Covid – far from it – but thankfully our experience was a positive one.

We've had some struggles with the eldest – he's in full swing teenage mode, but we're just holding onto the fact that someday he'll come out the other end. Covid has helped in some ways and been a huge hindrance in others, but at least he's an introvert like me so hasn't totally suffered from a lack of social interaction.

Holidays in 2020 were pretty limited. In the post-lockdown summer we took a trip to Oxford to see Wifey's dad, which was actually quite a fun time, which involved a fair amount of outdoorsy type activities. Then in December we embarked on a trip to Bluestone in Pembrokeshire. We knew it was going to be a bit different because Covid had meant a lot of the activities were limited or cancelled. Even so, we'd been looking forward to getting away and having a break post-fostering. However, what started out as a fun and relaxing time was cut short when the news about new lockdown measures to deal with Covid were announced (mainly because of a mutant strain that was doing the rounds). We got notification from the resort management that they were closing and we had to be out by lunchtime the following day. So, we'd only been there two nights when we should have been there for five. It was gutting, but the good thing was that we'd all had a really good time - even our eldest, who had been quite negative in the run-up to going. We'd been to the pool and had lots of fun there, enjoyed take away pizza and gone for a walk in the woods. It was also a good way of introducing the boys to what Bluestone had to offer and hopefully means they will want to go again another time (when all of the facilities are up and running). So, a bit disappointing, but at least we got to get away for a bit - and we'll get a refund, so maybe we'll be able to go again next year.

One big change to the household (as well as having a foster child live with us) has been our new cat. Bryn is his name and he's a rescue cat that we acquired in the summer. Apparently, he was found wandering some hill somewhere (which is where he got his name, Welsh for Hill) and was about a year old – although the rescue centre didn't know for sure. He took a while to settle in and get used to us and now he's very much a part of the family. We've decided to keep him indoors for the time being, just because we're not sure our neighbourhood is the safest place for pets. There's plenty of busy roads and other cats roaming around so we're not sure he'll fare too well. It's nice to have a cuddly creature in the house, but he does have a tendency to claw the carpet (when we have a perfectly good scratch post!) and wakes us up several times in the night – either to just sit on our bed or play with an imaginary mouse. Even after saying goodbye to our foster child, our sleep patterns still leave a lot to be desired. Still, he's become a firm favourite with the boys – our very own therapeutic pet – so that's good.

Looking at my only other post of 2020 (way back in January when everything was just a normal level of sh*ttiness) I was looking forward to the year ahead with wide-eyed optimism about learning Welsh, progressing with a new YouTube channel, finishing my first feature-film script and getting fit and healthy. Wellllll .... things didn't quite go according to plan, but that's not entirely my fault.

The good news is that I finally got into the swing of things in terms of good health and diet. Soon after lockdown I got roped into the Joe Wicks obsession, and number one son persuaded me to start running again. It was a bit of a shock to the system but I managed to keep it going. It was, however, slightly soul-destroying to be doing Joe Wicks five days a week and going for a run three evenings a week only to find that I hadn't lost any weight. Turns out, I have to eat better as well. Doh!

I had gotten into the mentality that, because I was exercising, I was allowed to eat any crap I liked. Sadly, for my particular kind of metabolism, that just isn't the case. Once I worked out my BMI and discovered that technically I was obese, I decided to double down and try and lose some weight. This involved being more careful with what I ate (along with the regular exercise), and I managed to drop about 9kg which I'm quite pleased about. Saying that, I've put most of it back on over the Christmas period because basically I decided to pause the good eating plan until the new year. The main thing is that I know I can lose weight and how I can do it – so that will be my plan for '21.

What about the other stuff I'd planned to do? Well, learning Welsh didn't happen because going to classes was not an option for the whole of 2020, thanks to Covid. Maybe when things ease off in 2021 I'll be able to sign up for one. I guess there's the option of online learning but, given my comments earlier about Zoom, it's not something that I'd want to do if I can help it. But I do want to learn as soon as I am able.

I actually have started a YouTube channel, although it doesn't have any live videos yet and I only set it up in December. It's going to be about Universal Basic Income, and I don't expect it to become some kind of online sensation – just an outlet for my desire to shout about UBI whenever I can. What's been interesting about 2020 is that UBI has become part of the ongoing discussion about how to cope with the pandemic. What began as a fringe policy idea at the start of the year has become pretty much mainstream, advocated by most opposition parties across the world. We have yet to see any countries adopt it wholeheartedly, but as the economic effects of Covid continue to cause hardship and suffering, it seems to me like the only solution that will actually make a difference. Time will tell.

And what about my feature film script? Well, I did actually complete the first draft during lockdown. Being the first draft, though, means I have to go through it with a fine tooth-comb and sort out the wrinkles and mistakes. That may take a while. My ambitions for making a low-budget feature film have been hampered somewhat by the pandemic. Given the current state of affairs, it's a logistical nightmare to film anything complicated which conform to social distancing and hygiene requirements - I am not rushing into trying to do anything for now. Once things settle down I will, but for the time being I am exploring the possibility of doing something that is more realistic. Namely, something audio drama based. Watch this space.

Talking about films, I only went to the cinema three times during the whole of 2020. Before the lockdown, I saw David Copperfield at the Everyman Boutique cinema for my birthday (which was fun). During the pandemic I saw Tenet and Mank – both very good films and both very different. It's not like I go to the cinema all the time, but I was certainly very aware of the impact the pandemic has had on the filmmaking business. There is a lot of talk about the industry adapting to the new paradigm and everything going online. This is a shame because going to the cinema is such an 'event', especially when you don't go that often. It would be sad if all the cinemas shut. I'm sure many will, but I can't imagine cinema trips becoming a thing of the past – unless we continue to have a virus disrupting our lives and stopping us from meeting in large groups.

So that's my roundup of 2020. I am reluctant to even speculate about 2021. We still have Brexit to contend with, as well as the Trump/Biden handover. And of course, Covid – and the effects of the pandemic – are here to stay for a good while yet.

If any of us manage to get through the next twelve months alive I will call that a win.